Eros (passionate love) or Agape (stable and devoted relationship)?

Eros: love is a consuming, desperate longing for the loved one, who is perceived as different, mysterious and ambiguous. Feelings such as: excitement, ecstasy, drama, fear, tension, mystery and longing are associated.

The depth of love is measured by the intensity of the obsession with the loved one and  willingly enduring pain, difficulties for the sake of the relationship. Important obstacles often have to be overcome, and there is an element of suffering. Not much time or attention is given to other interests or goals, because most energy is channeled towards memories of past encounters or imagining future ones.

Agape: love is a partnership in which two people  they give each other affection,  involvement, share many values, interests, common goals and tolerate each other  individual differences. Feelings such as: peace, safety, devotion, understanding, friendship, support and mutual comfort are associated.

The depth of love is measured by a relationship of trust and mutual respect  but also through the desire to make a sincere analysis of the person himself.  An individuality that allows everyone to be more expressive, creative and productive in life, in order to develop relationships and deepen intimacy, joy  to share experiences (from the past, present and in anticipation of the future).

If in a passionate relationship full of excitement, suffering, frustration there is the feeling that there is a lack of commitment, a means of stabilization  which provide certainty and safety; then in a true commitment, with certainty, affection, mutual attention, the question arises where the passion has disappeared, and the two may feel cheated in their expectations. Maybe everyone has a price: for passionate love -  the fear and pain that feeds it but can also destroy it; for stable commitment -  the monotony, the certainty and the security that consolidates it, can make it rigid and lifeless.

And yet, if the excitement and challenge in the relationship are maintained after the commitment, they must be based not on frustration or burning desire, but on a deeper and deeper exploration. Trust and honesty must combine with the boldness and vulnerability of passion to  explore the mysteries we embody together as man and woman, to create true intimacy, in the exposure of our deepest selves.